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Want to have a second date..? Order hot beverage in the first one

July 19, 2009

If you have been working hard to bring up the courage to speak to that girl you like, who doesn’t know you yet, make sure that while she sees you the first time she has been in contact with some warm stuff. Don’t just introduce yourself to a girl who has just had a drink of cold water from the water cooler. Go greet that girl with a warm coffee in hand.

Psychologists have proven that when we meet a new person after or with some contact with physical warmth as hot coffee or tea we are more likely to perceive the person as having ‘Warm’ personality traits such as ‘Friendly’ and ‘Trustworthy’. Whereas if we are introduced to a person just after contact with ‘Cold’ physical stimulus like a cold drink or ice-cream we tend to perceive the person as ‘Non Friendly’ and ‘Untrustworthy’. (Not totally just upto some extent)

And this is because our mind associates this ‘Physical warmth’ with the ‘Psychological warmth’ we got from our caretakers/ parents in our early years, so we tend to feel about this person as we did for our caretakers as trustworthy. We then like this person and want to continue being friends with them.

This works on first introductions only as we make our first impression for every person within seconds of meeting them. And mostly stick to it forever.

Not applicable in case of already known persons. So don’t deny your girl the ice-cream you promised just afraid she might avoid you next time, because in this case she will avoid you because you didn’t fulfill the promise. And no stimulus is going to help you there.

The research also said that after contact with a warm stimulus we tend to be more giving than being selfish. As the people who participated chose gifts for their friends instead of themselves after being in touch with a warm stimulus compared to ones who were in contact with a cold stimulus who chose the goodies for themselves.

So the physical warmth has that effect on the human psychology. We are more generous and friendly when warm.

Stay warm stay friendly…

So is it why spring time is the best for love..???? Warmth is in the air. Best suitable for all natural things to flourish flowers, greenery and friendship.

31 Comments leave one →
  1. July 19, 2009 9:21 am

    Nice tip, Oorja! 😀
    Lets see when I can utilize that! 😀 😛

    Hmm… let me know when u do.. 😀

    • July 20, 2009 6:33 am

      watch out dude… I completely say no to this theory…

      if she spills cold water over you head… its much better….

      imgain the warm coffee running down your neck…..

  2. July 19, 2009 9:24 am

    just when u r trying to make sense out of the existing theories… they come up with some blasted convoluted new one!! ok now where/how did they come up with this???

    hmm interesting theory alrite… considering a lot of ppl who meet up in pubs order (iced) drinks – alcoholic or otherwise – and then spend the nite together! oh well… there goes that theory! back to square one.. sigh! 😛 lol

    Hahahaha.. 😀 😀 ..
    oh.. hope the pubs don’t sue me for this… hey i just read it somewhere… 😀 😛

  3. July 19, 2009 11:43 am


    Haina… 🙂

  4. shraddha permalink
    July 19, 2009 11:47 am that how young people think these days…lol!!!

    sorry about kv bashing on my blog..did not mean to offend anyone..


    Welcome here.. 🙂

    Oh no problem, just that being a KV product it felt odd not to respond..

  5. July 19, 2009 11:51 am

    Very interesting and nice Oorja.. 🙂

    Let me see whether it can help me 😛 😛

    sure… go ahead…. make sure the coffee isn’t toooo hot 😀 😀

  6. Rajkumar permalink
    July 19, 2009 1:48 pm

    your blog is very interesting.I like to add you in my blog roll
    I welcome you to my blog,leave your valuable comments and your link back is welcomed……….

    Welcome here.. 🙂

    i checked your url is not proper. it is showing some error.

  7. Amit permalink
    July 19, 2009 7:41 pm

    This is crazy stuff. Guess I need to carry a thermos filled with hot tea when I meet a girl. 😦

    Hahaha.. trying to imagine how you would look.. stalking girls with a thermos in hand… 😀 😛

  8. panchalkc permalink
    July 19, 2009 9:29 pm

    I think I’d read a similar newspaper article long back, maybe about a year back. Could you please provide a link to it?

    actually i have a pdf of this research.. i’ll have to search for it.

    But I think there’s an intrinsic bias in the study–it must’ve been carried out in cold climates. So I think the factor must not be the warmth of the drink, but that it’d tend to bring body temperature closer (by raising it) to the most comfortable environmental temperature (24 celsius). But I think in much warmer climates, say above 35 celsius, people would get irritable drinking hot drinks, whereas would feel better and more receptive upon, say, drinking a soft drink (which would be closer to the temperature of 24 celsius).

    well it does make sense.. and it was conducted in a cold climatic country… but it was supposed to be the associated with the pschological warmth from the parents/ care givers.. so.. not sure…

    Also, did the study have a control–like are the researchers sure that the effect was because of temperature of the drink and not some substances in it like caffeine?

    researchers didn’t use coffee.. it was just my manipulation to make it interesting.. it meant in contact with anything warm. they had used a hot /cold water pouches…. no intake… just touch..

    But I’ll see if this idea works. I anyway have a lot of female volunteers vying to be experimented upon by me! 😛

    And tell me, why did you specifically give this tip to pataaofy only ladies, and not guys?

    hmmm… just trying to help my guy friends….

    read… *ladkiyon ko aaraam* 😉



  9. July 20, 2009 4:45 am

    ok ok 😛 I will try this trick out soon 😛 😛 😛 thanks!!!

    • July 20, 2009 6:33 am

      no Og… mark my words… dont…

      this is recipe for disaster…

      • July 20, 2009 6:42 am

        hehehe 😛 but since no other idea is working out now, i might as well try this!

        • Vimmuuu permalink
          July 20, 2009 3:41 pm

          Dhiren, some kids never learn !!! Sigh !!!

          look who’s talking….!!!! 😛

          • hitchwriter permalink
            July 21, 2009 5:25 am

            absolutely …. look at the desparation…. sigh….

            Don’t trust him OG.. he’s the first one secretly planning to try it…. 😛

            • hitchwriter permalink
              July 21, 2009 11:51 am

              I am happily married… I no intend to try no hot drinks… !! sigh…

              and what does this ‘sigh..’ mean..?? 😀
              angoor khatte hain..?

              • hitchwriter permalink
                July 21, 2009 4:59 pm

                sigh at the imagination you kids have…

                LOL.. 😛 😛

  10. Shayari permalink
    July 20, 2009 8:21 am

    Hmmm… Often read these kind of stuff in TOI. Within no time of their publishing,the contradicting reports on the very topic of debate would be out 😛

    ya these are just for fun… 😀

  11. laddu permalink
    July 20, 2009 9:44 am

    quite informative.. :):)

    you going to try it too…? 🙂

  12. Rashmi permalink
    July 20, 2009 10:58 am

    Well i like the last one..i can offer hot coffee to my hubby so that he can feel like buying gift for me 😆

    its really interesting theory to know..!!

    now this is one interesting angle to it… 😀 😀
    let me try tooo… 😀

  13. Vimmuuu permalink
    July 20, 2009 3:41 pm

    Seriously ???? But I dont drink tea and coffee, so what do I order when I go to coffee shops with some new girl (which is never going to happen in my life again, sigh !) ???? The only drink I can order is hot water, and she might end up thinking Im some boring person !!!!

    So you trust coffee or tea more than yourself…. LOL… 😛
    good it won’t happen again. you should be happy you came to know of it after its need was over….. otherwise next time it would have been.. hot water for us please.. 😛
    or the girl would drink coffee naa.. you could have bought her that.. anyway.. hmmm.. ab kya… 😀

    • Ashwathy permalink
      July 21, 2009 6:52 am

      u just said its not gonna happen in ur life again… so why worry? 😀 hehehe

      Right.. 😀 🙂

  14. Neeraja permalink
    July 20, 2009 7:03 pm

    Interesting :)… but I think this theory might work well in colder frigid climates/countries, for I can instantly relate to the magic of warm drinks 🙂

    yes it may be.. who wants hot drinks in hot weather… but it was not just about consumption but even touch sensation.. 🙂

  15. sachi permalink
    July 21, 2009 11:35 am

    that was an awesome piece of information.. will try doin that!! but durin a hot sunday afternoon hw ll i take her to a coffee shop and order for hot coffees!

    i think in those conditions hot coffee won’t be needed the heat itself will play the catalyst.. all the best.. 😀

    welcome here.. 🙂

  16. bedazzled permalink
    July 21, 2009 12:55 pm

    i dont buy this .. in a hot place like chennai , i am sure people would prefer a cold coffee rather than a cup of hot tea ..

    yes … i am sure these foreign researchers have never been to our Singara Chennai… 😀

  17. Swaram permalink
    July 22, 2009 10:20 am

    Awesome tip! Lets see when some guy here is gonna try n let us know 😉

    Me too waiting for that… 😀

  18. Pal permalink
    July 22, 2009 12:37 pm

    Very nice, sensible thoughts there, Oorja. Hope this sinks into a lot of our eligible bachelors 🙂

    Btw, you’ve been tagged:

    😀 let’s se what they do with this info… 🙂

    tag.. got it..

  19. Destination Infinity permalink
    July 22, 2009 1:40 pm

    I think in spring season, they promote this theory and in summer, the reverse… in the west and some extent India, the press is there to influence the political or commercial campaigns. But its better than my theory anyway 🙂 When I first heard the name Radio Mirchi – Its hot, it was a May summer afternoon in Chennai! I thought what the..? 🙂 But when I head the name Hell Freezes Over – in December, I still liked it.

    Destination Infinity

    Is the human mind influenced by such small things?

    it is the human mind.. it is influenced by everything..

    this was a psychological experiment that was conducted in controlled conditions.. but i am not sure what was the normal temp. it could have had some effect.

    In this theory when we are in contact with something warm it triggers our warm psychological feelings.

    but maybe we Indian in hot states have the reverse effects.. 😉

  20. July 28, 2009 8:43 am

    I never would have thought of this association, but it makes sense! Of course no trick is foolproof, there still has to be some compatibility there! And it would work better when it’s cold. Somehow, holding a hot beverage in your hands with someone who is doing the same seems very companionable.

    yes it sounds warm and cozy.. 🙂 and wil work best in winters..

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