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Together forever..

July 5, 2009

It’s been 25 years since they have been living together…

This very day they had decided to unite.

And today they are planning for a dinner together at their favourite restaurant where they have been going all these years. There everyone knew them, and liked them, and welcomed them with open arms.

But it was not the same always. Their decision had seen much opposition, from family and friends and neighbours and whom-so-ever knew or did not know them, every single one talked about them behind their backs, and some rude ones even in front of them.

Still love won over all.

It was their love for each other that kept them together.

Both of them were strong independent individuals who knew where to limit the interference of society in their personal lives.

Two beautiful individuals with hearts of gold. Friendly to everyone, helpful and genuinely nice people.

Shyamli and Neelima

Two best friends… How and when it turned into love no one knew.. not even them.

At first it was cute to families how both the girls had sisterly affection for each other. Then they became suspicious as they were too affectionate by their definitions.

It was not love at first sight. It was a friendship that grew.

Today they are accepted by everyone, even the ones who crinkled their noses at their sight of togetherness.

Now even their adopted daughter is accepted.

They proved themselves. In this society where divorce rates are going up, they were the couple who rarely had even loud discussions.

Their love was immense; they had fought the society to be together how could they fight each other..?

Today they are a happy family.

They are celebrating two occasions tonight.

Their love for each other and the togetherness of 25 years.

And their daughter has announced of her marriage to the man of her dreams.

They are the proud parents today.

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38 Comments leave one →
  1. July 5, 2009 8:54 am

    interesting…! now why did i know that was somehow coming? 🙂

    well.. i didn’t try to misguide much.. and you have feminine instincts… 🙂

    well-written btw!

    thanks.. 🙂

    a post as a tribute to the Delhi High Court’s decision regarding Section 377? 🙂

    absolutely.. trying to cash in the traffic… 😀

    • July 5, 2009 9:41 am

      hehehe… talk about honesty! 😀

      hehe.. 😀

      actually had written the first two sentenses a few days ago (before the news).. but stopped as it was going nowhere.. then last two days read enough about this topic so….. 🙂

      • July 6, 2009 8:03 am

        lol… this girl is really honest… !! is she… why havent i seen her earlier… !! 😛 😛

        lol… your wife would be very happy to know you didn’t notice a girl… for once… 😉

  2. July 5, 2009 10:00 am

    well written Oorja… 🙂

    Wonderful and its a landmark verdict given by Delhi HC 🙂

    🙂 i think we are finally understanding what freedom means.. 🙂

  3. July 5, 2009 11:21 am

    Well written. Bus as I said as a comment on my post, it is a personal take. And there are pros and cons. We could argue all day long, really, on this.

    that is true.. we could.. but definitely not on a religious con.. that is unfair.

  4. July 5, 2009 12:13 pm

    oh I had written blogpot.com instead of blogspot.com
    thats the issue.. now check..
    http://chiranjibmazumdar.blogspot.com

  5. July 5, 2009 12:15 pm

    I had written blogpot.com instead of blogspot.com
    that was the issue… now check…

    yes its working fine now..

  6. July 5, 2009 2:55 pm

    as usual very well written post Oorja… Hats off to DHC’s decision.

    thanks.. 🙂 a well needed decision i guess.. many other countries are already liberal about them..

  7. July 5, 2009 5:36 pm

    Hi Oorja!

    Honestly, maybe a year back I used to feel, people getting attracted to someone of the same sex, were actually pretending to do so only for attention. Though, even back then, I never thought it appropriate to restrict their cohabitation in any way.

    But after reading the following excellent article, I’m convinced that there are both biologic and psychologic bases for homosexuality, which make it TOTALLY NORMAL to harbor attraction towards same gender-persons.

    Though you might require to register to access this article (it’s free and not much hassle), I thought your psychology background would make it interesting for you:

    http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/293530-overview

    TC.

    Thanks Ketan.. i read the article.. and many of the points stated are absolutely true.. it is normal and not a psychological or psychaiatric defect / disorder.

    i also like the natural selection point.. maybe that is also a way of nature to select or control the next generation.

    i knew Freud would defnitely be involved.. as in any topic he can link sexuality and here that the issue.. and happy that he was the one who considered it normal initially. his expanations though don’t satisfy me much… but it is his theory.

    what i was surprised to see was that this phenomenon is also seen in animals..

    totally an informative read. thanks again..

  8. July 6, 2009 3:31 am

    When I was really young…must be 8 or something, there was this big news about two women in love running away from home to live together. This was the 80s. Gays/Lesbian term was not known to most so it shocked a small place in Kanpur. Then it was said that one girl had a surgery to become man. It shocked everyone. I didn’t even understand what it was unless years later when I read about Martina Navratilova in Indian Express and an article on gays in Bangalore. My eyes actually popped out then.

    Anyways, finally they can be part of “normal” society. Ofcourse people are not going to change their attitude but at least law is on their side.

    i came to know about people being gay / lesbian maybe by the end of 90’s..

    recently i came to know that Suze Orman (financial expert) is a lesbian.. i have been watching her show (on CNBC TV 18) for the past year or so and when i came to know i too was so shocked.. never expected that…

    yes it will take more than laws to change people’s attitudes..

  9. July 6, 2009 6:15 am

    wow yaar….well written..especially d line- they had fought the society to be together how could they fight each other..?

    its very nice 2 c dat we indians r getting 2 open up….but yaar still dere r few influential ppl in society like dat baba ramdev who needs 2 understand dat such ppl r also created by d same God who created him….

    thank you.. ya i too liked that line a lot.. 🙂

    that is a nice thought.. but did they ever consider Transsexuals to be normal humans.. they were rejected by the society.. so now they are living in their own communities…

    also these lesbians or gays need a lot of courage to speak up as there is always the fear of rejection by the society or atleast of being the laughing stalk..

  10. July 6, 2009 8:01 am

    very well written!
    and finally a good decision by the law 🙂

    Thanks.. 🙂
    Right.. finally..

    Welcome here.. 🙂

  11. July 6, 2009 8:03 am

    Wonderful post !!!!! really wonderful !!

    thanks a lot… 😀

  12. July 6, 2009 8:48 am

    I can see both the comments… !!!

    Yay they are back.. i can see them too…

    i wonder what happened.. i tried logging out and in 5 times and still no luck.. but now here they are.. oh how much i missed them.. my precious comments… 😀

    • July 6, 2009 9:12 am

      drunk in the morning ??? r u ??

      • July 6, 2009 9:24 am

        Hahahaha.. 😀 😀 no no.. i don’t drink…

        i was just expressing my joy on getting back my comments.. i thought i saw them and then they were gone.. i tried refreshing..

        for a second i thought i had imagined them… 🙂

  13. craftyshines permalink
    July 6, 2009 10:21 am

    oorja! what a sooper post! i loved ur narration, so gentle and yet so loud in celebration!

    thanks.. 🙂

    yes, it’s indeed a ray of hope towards a positive change, this new development!

    yayie from me on that!
    had this discussion at another blog too, few days back…
    i really do not support the terms of “straight” and “gay” (which equals to “not-straight”)

    who are we to decide what’s right and what’s not…

    absolutely.. it is their life… and they are as normal as us..

    for humans, sex is beyond an act of procreation…its a declaration of love, and being together to celebrate finding that one person special need not be labeled at all!

    i do not like this word “straight”. such a casual word, but it holds so much judgement and prejudice, no?

    I don’t understand why such a word is needed.. ? it is the most common sexual orientation..

    but this repelling of this law is a breather! we have started somewhere!

    yes it is a good start as it will create more awareness as it will be talked more openly.. now that it has all media attention.. those who did not have a voice yet may come out in open..

    loved ur post! HUGS! 😀

    *Hugs back* 😀

  14. July 6, 2009 10:46 am

    Beautifully written Oorja! 🙂
    loved it 🙂

    I have never been able to understand and I still am not able to as to why anyone ANYONE has a problem with what anotehr person does?
    Why do we have to interfere in another person’s choice?
    isnt life all about choices?

    that is Human Nature.. we believe we are our society’s moral police.. and if anyone is moving an inch here or there from the set rules.. we jump in and try to bend thing the way we want.. unknowing that we ourselves have done things which may or may not abide the same set of rules… when we do it its our freedom.. when other’s do it.. they’re crossing the limits..

    Who are we to tell anyone to not do or do anything?

    Arent we all human beings?

    that seems to be the trouble.. we see ourselves as superior than the other.. as if it is our responsibility to keep others on track.. (the way we want)

    for that matter any living being has the right to live with dignity and with freedom!

    every human should have that freedom.. it is their right to make their own choices… and how loving someone of your sex makes you less dignified..? they are much higher than those so called “Straight” people who spread hatred..

    *sigh* more on this later…

    heard some lame arguments regarding this among people I know and it just left me amazed

  15. July 6, 2009 12:08 pm

    Sums it all! Good post there, Oorja 🙂

    Hey you’re back.. 🙂 how was the wedding..? and life now.. 🙂

    • July 7, 2009 11:24 am

      Yeah ma’am! 🙂
      All went well.It’s new,it’s nice Oorja! 🙂

      Great.. 🙂 Enjoy….

  16. July 6, 2009 12:29 pm

    umm .. thot it was gonna be about something else ..good post

    Hmm.. what did you think it was about..? 🙂

  17. July 6, 2009 12:58 pm

    also thank you so much for your words 🙂
    muah! 😀
    will be replying today….got back today 🙂

    Hey Indy.. always welcome.. 🙂

  18. July 6, 2009 5:08 pm

    that is a nice story!!

    Thanks.. 🙂

  19. July 6, 2009 6:09 pm

    First time on your post and I really liked the story.
    I welcome the verdict of the Delhi High court but am wondering whether making homosexuality legal would actually mean the acceptance level would go up.
    But it still is a positive step and I hope all other legal reforms would slowly follow.

    Welcome here.. 🙂

    yes the change in people’s attitude will take some more time.. but till then atleast they have the law on their side.. 🙂

  20. July 6, 2009 6:48 pm

    I demand a twist ! 😀

    What if they had adopted a boy ?

    ok, dont say that he would have got married too. I need an entirely different twist to this story; happy or sad, all upto you. Readers request ! You shouldnt ignore ! 😀 😀

    Vimmuuu why..?

    this was supposed to be a nice soft one..

    okay if a boy.. two possibilities.. you don’t want him married.. if he is gay the point of the story dies.. what can we do here.. ? 🙂

    btw the new smileys are not that good. hai naa…?

  21. July 7, 2009 7:07 am

    Well as an aside, since you mention him, I’ve been an absolute fan of Sigmund Freud’s works to the extent I’ve read them (initial portion of English translation of ‘The Interpretation of Dreams’ and Wikipedia articles on ‘psychosexual development’, ‘id, ego and superego’ and ‘psychoanalysis’)!

    It’s said he’d an IQ of 185, and after reading his work, never have I doubted that once. Darwin’s had been pitted at 185, Newton’s 175, Einstein’s 165 and Leonardo da Vinci’s at 220.

    When we’ve to consider the ingenuity of someone’s ideas, we’ve to also consider the baseline knowledge available to them during their lifetime to build upon. That way Freud had literally invented psychiatry (I think). My psychiatry teachers was very shocked in my second year when he came to know I hadn’t heard of Freud, and even I was when I finally read about him. 🙂

    Though there are a few things I’ve not been able to understand–practical events leading to development of penis envy in girls! I could never understand that.

    TC.

    i first read about him in my 1st year when psychology was not my subject. i really loved the id, ego and superego concept. and my interest in Psy. also increased leading me to pursue it in my PG.

    though Freud was a genius (no doubts there)… but all his analysis lead only to sex-realted interpretation..we humans are not just sex crazed maniacs…

    how would he explain spirituality.. and enlightenment..?

    some time ago i read an article which said that sexual activity drains one of the kind of energy which could lead to spiritual enlightenment.. hence it is off limits to all spiritual seekers..

    i believe psychoanalysis is very effective.. i think no matter what behavioral psychologist do.. if one is internally not free of the trouble.. no amount of external behavioral change is going to help.. it may seem like working.. and it does in some kind of cases (like phobias) but deep rooted problems are better understood by psychoanalysis. and i love the free word associaltion.. think it really leads to the point..

    but only if all the interpretations didn’t lead to sex-related trouble it would have been THE Best..

    • July 7, 2009 12:29 pm

      Oorja,

      I’ve always been so curious about free association sessions and all that. In our UG days, we’ve had very little exposure to psychiatry and much less to psychology. Have you witnessed/conducted free association sessions? How does it feel? Are patients cooperative enough? Like someone suffering from acute psychosis?

      unfortunately i haven’t.. but i think something should be available on youtube.. they put everything there. i have seen some cognitive behaviour therapy videos..

      You’re infinitely better read than me in psychology, but I’ve felt Freud didn’t relate everything to sex, just that he widened the definition of sexual attraction so much that any other kind of drive when seeing through his respective also seems like use typical sexual urge. For instance, if the ‘id within you’ wants gratification by having something fatty and sweet (say, an ice cream), Freud has considered it analogous to someone wanting gratification through genital stimulation (having sex)–most commonly (don’t confuse with commonest urge to be seen in adults) seen in adults. He also further clarifies that at various stages of child’s development, the body parts that become the center of that gratification are different. Like, a child wanting to put everything in its mouth when between the ages 1 to 3.

      yes not exactly but still when he applied that logic regarding children’s behaviour. it went totally off track.. and was misunderstood.

      Also some his terms like ‘libido’ are wrongfully taken to be sexual in nature, when he’d used libido to mean any kind of drive to do ANYTHING (like eating your ice cream 🙂 ). Also, I think he’d talked of the opposite concept of thanatos–the desire to escape existing or anticipated pain by reaching a state close to death, one of absolute numbness–like one’s wanting to sleep instead of climbing a flight of 10 stairs (if you’re not enjoying it).

      yes the Thanthos and Eros.. were desire to die(not literally) or live…

      And yes, the concepts of id, ego and superego are just one of the best scientific models developed by anyone in human history (again, my personal opinion 😉 )!

      And I have a personal doubt–what do you mean by the term–‘spirituality’? I’ve heard that term a lot, and I don’t use it myself because I don’t understand its meaning. At one instance I’d used the term–‘spirital health’, by which I’d meant “level of happiness and contentment and degree of ease with the people around and circumstances we’re in”. But yet, that’s not what people seem to mean when using the term. If one means–one’s purpose in life,and role in the Universe–it anyway falls in the domain of philosophy. Also, enlightenent is a term I use very occasionally, but when I do, I mean understanding something very complex or abstract…

      Spirituality .. again confused with religion by people… actually i am reading a book called “Talks with Ramana Maharishi” and his idea of spirituality is that “all is one.. ” we and God / nature/ power/ whatever it is.. is all one. living or non living.. ONE.

  22. July 7, 2009 12:40 pm

    …I’ve not read Freud enough to comment upon whether he’s dealt with desire to be liked, to be seen as important, relevant and influential, but to the extent I’ve read, seems like he hasn’t dealt with those concepts. I personally feel, the desire to be liked and considered important and indispensable is the driving force for many things in our lives. Like our trying to find a purpose to our life, or wanting to make people happy (and then subconsciously wanting them to remember us for that), or wanting people to like what we write, wear, speak, etc.

    All this comes under social Psychology.. the way we behave in socity with people.. many of the ocial psychologists have dealt with it.. i don’t remember any now.. but i can look up..

    You know if Freud, or in particular which psychiatrist/psychologist has dealt with these issues?

    BTW, my freshest post is a poem I’d written quite long back and somewhat deals with enlightenment.

    seems like a must read.. 🙂

    Thanks in advance!

    🙂

    TC.

    you too..

  23. July 7, 2009 9:20 pm

    I wish this was a true story. Or is it?

    ya me too.. 🙂 or there may be a pair like this we don’t know about yet.. could be..

  24. July 8, 2009 5:05 am

    Sweet! But like Amit I have to ask, is this a true story?

    this particular one is purely my imagination..

  25. July 9, 2009 8:22 am

    Awesome story…and hope 377 is abolished everywhere ..if not lets declare india as a colony of britain[of the 18th century] and vow allegiance to Victoria’s crown.

    🙂 right…!!!

  26. July 9, 2009 10:44 am

    Lovely narration! 🙂

    Thanks.. 🙂

  27. July 9, 2009 7:10 pm

    interesting story

    Thanks..

    Welcome here.. 🙂

  28. July 11, 2009 7:08 am

    You have an award!
    http://chiranjibmazumdar.blogspot.com/2009/07/yey-award.html

    Thanks a lot dear.. 😀

  29. July 12, 2009 11:52 am

    I have never understood, what creates the urge for same sex attraction. But if it does, then I think law cannot come in between to consenting adults, anyway.

    right.. neither law or religion must come between two consenting adults..

    It would be good if you can write a post on that id, ego and superego concepts. We would like to know more about them. This is the first time, I am reading about that!

    Sure i will..

    Destination Infinity

  30. July 13, 2009 4:56 pm

    Wow! Oorja, that was fantastic! You have told the story so beautifully!

    The last few days, I have seen debates, write-ups condemning such a union – why – simply beats me!
    Who are we to decide which unions are the ‘right’ ones? Who are we to say – love between so and so is fine but not between another two? I just wish couples like this could live their lives – the way they want to – and not be hounded by society, forced to conform…

    Loved the story, the way you narrated – everything about it!

    thanks.. 🙂

    i too was very fed up with all the religious debates… how is love a criminal act i can never understand.

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