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I am my dad

June 21, 2009

No I am not turning into a man again, but lately I have observed that I am behaving very much like my dad.

He is a great father. Gentle and funny and at the same time strict and responsible. He has got such a strong personality that there is an air of dignity around him. He has been a great role model to me all my life.

He was always present in all my achievements, school declared my results later, first came his presents for having a good result. That much confidence he had on me.

I remember when I was in my fourth standard/grade. He got me my bicycle as he had promised a week before the results were to be announced, by the time I got my results I was already riding my bicycle.. Which he taught me of course.

Many of his ways of life I find very interesting. Though waking up at 5 am is not my cup of tea. He truly believes in ‘Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise just as in the poem. And I see from his life that it is actually true. Still I find it hard to bring into my life.

I have always admired my dad. Appa or Papa as I call him. He was my hero since my childhood as every little girl sees her father. He knew everything. Whatever I asked him he had the answers even when I didn’t even ask he gave me the answers. My one stop trouble solver.

When we lived together sometimes this thing about him used to annoy me a bit. Him knowing everything already and letting me know before I get a chance to find it out my way. Because I always believe that everyone should find their own answers and only when there is no choice they must seek help. But he always helped because he didn’t want his kids to make mistakes; he wanted to use all his knowledge so that we never have to face failures or pitfalls in our lives.

Now I see, I think like him, talk like him, and work like him. I am becoming the second him.

He always knew everything and I can’t say that enough. Be it regarding studies or general knowledge, latest news or legal procedures whatever my trouble was he was there with details. He was always too cautious and asked to get an extra set of photocopies of every paper. Forms or mark-sheets or anything, and just because of him I have a bundle of old photocopies in store.

He has always been too cautious and careful; overprotective and over caring. Though he never expressed his true emotions, his presence always gave a sense of security to me. I always know he’s there to support me in anything I do, though he may not verbally commit to it.

In my teenage years when his over-protectiveness started to get into my freedom of going out and enjoying with friends, I saw us not getting along very well. But he never denied me my freedom of speech. He would listen to all of my pleads and only approve of my visit to the places which were o.k. according to him. Which were a very few. But as I matured to a higher age, I felt whatever he did was the best for me.

I still can’t forget when he actually cried when he was doing my ‘Kanyadaan’.

We have come even closer after I got married. Maybe living apart has actually worked best for both of us.

He doesn’t talk much, because he observes a lot. He has this unique sense of judging people when he meets them. And I sometimes feel that his sixth sense too may be tuned in as he always knew what will happen next; how a person will react in a situation or even how the suspense movie was going to end (this was the annoying part – no suspense). He predicted everything correctly, and I used to be amazed to actually witness all that he had said happening really.

I hear myself talk these days and I am so reminded of him. Just the way he would have said. Not that I am doing anything intentionally. Now I am trying to understand that the only reason he could do all this was because he thought ahead of the present. He understood people. And that is what I have been trying to do forever but haven’t succeeded in many of the cases. But now I am getting a hang of it.

I enjoy being my Dad.

24 Comments leave one →
  1. June 21, 2009 6:55 am

    dady es are always caring and strict on the same side,a strange combination.while going thru your post for a while i thought you are describing my dad’s nature.
    completely agree with you on what you have written…

    True.. daddies are always like that.. 🙂
    they show their care by being strict.. strange combo.. right. we need them to be like that.

  2. Apar permalink
    June 21, 2009 10:06 am

    A really nice “Oorja” post 🙂 Apt Father’s day one 😀

    Had actually written it a couple of months ago.. but never got an opportunity to publish it.. then thought what better day than Father’s day.. 😀

  3. June 21, 2009 10:31 am

    Nice post, Oorja… a sort of tribute to your dad! Parents deserve so much respect from us and how often, we forget the importance of their presence. Each parent is special in individual ways and we ought to give them their due respect, although it is impossible to pay back their debt!

    Well done… enjoy being your dad. I am sure you would learn so much more about life and would be able to take more informed and mature decisions!

    We get so much from them that at times we forget to thank them for that..
    maybe this is an attempt to do that.. 🙂

  4. June 21, 2009 11:23 am

    I too share more similarities with my dad than my mom!!

    🙂 me too..

  5. June 21, 2009 1:45 pm

    nice post .. a lot of ways i have always wanted to be like my father and people say that my temperament and mannerisms are a lil like my dad .. but i think i am closer to amma mainly cos appa was away a lot when i was growing up .. but like u said we have grown closer after me getting married..

    Distance sure has a good effect on relationships with parents..
    i look like my mom and do have a few good habits from her side too.. 😀

  6. June 21, 2009 2:34 pm

    My dad also very caring and strict… reminded me of him now 🙂

    All dads are like that.. 🙂

  7. June 21, 2009 6:39 pm

    My dad is one lovable teddy bear. and I always felt he liked his brothers kids more than us. LOL.

    Nice post, did you dad get to read it? Im sure he would need a box of tissues beside him ! 🙂

    He is..? oh how sweet.. 🙂
    LOL he likes your cousins more.. 😀 i wonder why..

    he generally is not a tissue box user, but i can never be too sure.. will ask mom of his reactions..

    • June 22, 2009 10:17 am

      LOL, with a son like this, do you have to wonder enough??? 😀 😀

      Jokes apart, he is a sweet thing ! He still holds my hand while crossing the street 🙂

      LOL .. right i should have known.. 😀

      Quite contrary your father seems very sweet.. let him know i think so.. 🙂

  8. June 21, 2009 8:07 pm

    Same here. I am more like my dad than my mom! 🙂
    I am not sure though if it is a good or a bad thing! 😆

    We are like them not just because of our ‘Genes’ but because we unconciously see them as our role models.. so it shouldn’t be a bad thing. 🙂

  9. June 21, 2009 8:59 pm

    What an apt post on this day. I am more like my Dad too in many ways.

    Happy Father’s Day to your Dad and you! 🙂

    Happy Father’s day to you and your dad too… 🙂

  10. June 22, 2009 1:06 am

    A coincidence that I wrote something very similar. Looks like our dads share a lot in common, especially in terms of judging people with an accuracy of a sixth sense… although mine can hardly be called strict 🙂

    Ya i read your post.. what a coincidence.. 🙂
    its their foresight… maybe we’ll get there too with age..
    really..? that is nice.. 🙂

  11. June 22, 2009 2:29 am

    well…. happy fathers day 😛 though I am late…… 😛

    Happy Fatehr’s day to you too..
    better late than never.. 😀

  12. June 22, 2009 3:37 am

    my daddy strongest….:):)

    even my daddy is ultra protective, ultra caring and i also have a bundle of photocopies at my home..:):) guess all daddys r like dis only….and who knows tom i ll also become like him!!!!!

    That was one cute ad.. my daddy strongest..! 😀
    you too have bundles photocopies. i can imagine..

    ultra protective caring daddies maybe a bit difficult to manage in teen years but their kids always turn out as good people. 🙂

    • June 25, 2009 4:46 am

      yup u r right….as ppl say- i am good, just too good….:):)

      😀 of course…

  13. June 22, 2009 5:55 am

    awww… cute post 🙂
    yes it’s true tho… we all turn into parents in one way or the other at some point of time… whether we like it or not!

    😀 especially when we become parents ourselves even our dialogues will match them.. and we’ll have a feeling of Déjà vu.. 🙂

  14. June 22, 2009 5:58 am

    This is such a wonderful post!!!!

    I used to be very stubborn (I still am) and would always be on loggerheads with Mom but one word from my Dad & used to agree with him.

    I guess all girls have a special bond with their dads!!! 🙂

    thanks.. !
    no wonder the phrase ‘Daddy’s girl’ is so famous.. 🙂

  15. June 22, 2009 2:02 pm

    I can say ditto for everything you have said about your father! My dad is the absolute same I must say. It was probably the first time anyone had seen him cry in the past 40 years perhaps, during my bidaai. 🙂

    He was actually saying “Why do I have to send my girl away!?”

    Got me tears in my eyes. I know I am a total photocopy of my dad in looks and in nature too!

    They spend all their lives loving and protecting their daughters and then letting them go is relally hard for them.. moms somehow are stronger as they too have left their homes once and know it is how our culture works.. but dads.. 🙂

  16. June 22, 2009 2:09 pm

    Happy father’s Day Oorja to your Appa or Uncle 🙂
    (((hugs))for Uncle:)
    you have shared so beautifully… I could see so much of myself too in places..and the bond I share with dad 🙂

    (((hugs)))for you too 🙂
    look at what a sensitive, darling daughter he has ! 🙂

    (((Hugs back)))) to you too…. and Happy Father’s day to you and uncle too.. 🙂
    wish that all father-daughter relationships flourish beautifully… 😀

  17. June 22, 2009 2:15 pm

    PS:-your sidebar looks beautiful! 😀

    Thanks.. 😀
    i am learning to express myself….

  18. June 23, 2009 12:02 pm

    reminded me of my dad.. he is no longer with me but still…

    Parent’s never leave us.. they live in our hearts..

  19. June 23, 2009 3:15 pm

    Nice tribute to the first man in your life. Very sweet post! 🙂

    My dad’s my best friend! 🙂

    Thanks.. 🙂 yes the first man i ever knew..

    its great to find a great friend in a parent.. its a life long delight..

  20. June 24, 2009 10:23 am

    I think some times parents are over protective (My comment has nothing to do with this particular post, of course). They think that by spoon feeding (which many do), the kids will achieve the heights that were beyond them. Agreed that the wanting is correct, but they should let the kids be on their own and discover the good and the bad of life earlier (They anyway do, after a point of time – like when living alone or starting to work etc.).

    i agree.. i too feel that every person must be let free to make his own goals and the route to achieving it.. too much pressure by the parents can have some negative effects on the kids..

    And secondly many parents believe that if we shower money on the kids and get them what ever they want, they will be happiest. They might be, but this attitude spoils the kids. They won’t know the value of money this way.

    Destination Infinity

    They do so because they do not know any other way.. they don’t /can’t spare enough time or real care so the shower money and believe they have done a lot.

  21. June 25, 2009 8:20 am

    That was such a sweet sweet post, Oorja.. It reminded me of my dad too – in so many ways.. waking up early, the gentleness….

    ‘a strong personality that there is an air of dignity around him. He has been a great role model to me all my life.’ Its been the same with me too.. I think we are lucky to be blessed with such wonderful fathers!

    Belated wishes for father’s day – I am really really late in reaching this post 😦

    Wishes for you and your dad too.. 🙂

    Really.. we have been blessed to have great Fathers.. 🙂

  22. June 27, 2009 11:38 am

    Great work Oorja. You have really renergized my feelings I have for my dad. And just when I started reading your post. It was maybe a coincidence or what that, in one screenshot, the title “I am my dad” was just below the header image of the ladies. Wow!! It actually did make a good view.
    You are a great daughter (Convey this to your father) 🙂

    Thanks Dev.. i wll surely convey it to him.. i can see him nodding already… 🙂

    i am glad it made you think of your father.. 🙂

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