I would like to be myself…. Not joking… Not the one who people of the world see. Who is all tied up with social & moral thoughts. But the real me….

One who wants to live….

I would wander through unknown cities…. Alone…. See what nature & man have created together…

I would let my mind to be free to think what come may….. & not worry what if anyone comes to know of it…

I would spend my days at a local garden with a nice book in hand..

I would roam all evenings at the beach…. Till the moon shines right on the top…..

I would spend long cozy mornings in my bed…..

I would have a dog right besides me when I go for a walk…

I would have dessert before the dinner….

I would scuba dive and snorkel in the Great Barrier Reef…

I would climb a few small hills just for a hike…

I would have a tattoo or two… 

I would help a small child with her life. Maybe adopt one so when I finish my life I have a sense of achieving something…..

I would fall in love with him again…

I would write for my satisfaction….

Yes, I surely would like to be myself……

Who would you like to be…?

My contribution to Blog Action Day 09 -

He goes for his late night swim and finds a dead rat in his private pool and orders for a full drain and cleaning.

“Water crisis In African countries – people dying of thirst” is the news flashing on his LED TV.

“Did you hear the world is coming to an end with this climatic changes”..

“Yes but we need not care I am sure by that time we would have found some other planet to encroach, we have great scientists”..

 

Conversation on 5 year olds -

“You know my mommy was telling me that we should not bother animals and birds as they too have life and feel pain just like us.”

“you should not bother what has life…. “Then why do you eat them..? Do you eat people also..?” asked the other worried kid.

 

“Wow, it was such a tiring day…!” said the first friend.

“Yes, we covered about 30 shops in 5 hours, that is our latest record.” Confirmed the second one happily, looking at the loads of shopping bags in heir hands..

“But it is bad that all the leather shoes and bags are getting costlier by the day.. remember we got them for half the price last season.” Complained the first one.

“Yes the designers have no compassion for their regular customers, they just want to make money.” The second one replied walking right under the huge banner that said Save the Endangered animals avoid leather products.

 

He said he’d take her to the moon..

And saw two sweet questioning eyes.

He said ‘I love you’ every night..

Still felt something was not right..

What was it she was looking for..

Pleasing her, how could it be done?

And one night suddenly a thought came to him,

And when she least expected him..

He showed up at her door with a single rose..

And saw her face bloom like a garden..

He realized the truth that night..

That is all what a woman’s heart wants..

Small surprise tokens of the love.

I have this habit… don’t know if it is good or bad but I do have it…

I can’t Quote a ‘Quotes’ as a Quote..

Confused…? What I mean is, when I read any quote I just take in the gist and say it in my own words..

I like quotes a lot.. they are like small inspirational books in themselves.. leave a great impression on you in minimal number words.. which is a great quality in its own.. but my problem is I can’t remember those very less number of words as it is.. though I can write a whole page write up explaining it.

Somehow I just can’t remember the exact words of the ‘Other Person’. That used to cause me some troubles during school/college days when you have to remember the definitions given by famous people exactly in their words. But I always preferred not to do it.. all my class used to mug up the quotes and write them, but I was the only one in the class who rarely used this sign “______” to fill it with the real quote or definition. I just ditched the dangerous sign and wrote what the person meant in his/her quote.. and then used to continue with what I had to say.

How can I remember these quotes….? those are not my words and moreover that is not my idea.. no matter how much I like the quote and the lesson we get from it……. I can’t remember it…. how can I remember it exactly.. and why should I..? It is the inner meaning of it that is important not the exact words..

Once I read this in a book called The Prayer of a Frog –

A philosopher who had only one pair of shoes asked the cobbler to repair them for him while he waited.

 “It’s closing time,” said the cobbler, “so it won’t be possible for me to repair them just now. Why don’t you come for them tomorrow?”

 “I have only one pair of shoes and it won’t be possible for me to walk without shoes.” “Very well. I shall lend you a used pair for the day.”

“What! Wear someone else’s shoes? What do you take me for?”

“Why should you object to having someone else’s shoes on your feet when you don’t mind carrying other people’s ideas in your head?”

And maybe after that I started feeling what I was doing was right.

Aren’t we supposed to live life like that too.. if we see other people’s lives and like what we see we can’t just copy paste them into our lives.. We must modify and moderate the morals of other’s lives to fit in ours.

Not everyone gets benefited by the same kind of advice. Every person is unique so every person must follow a tailor-made solution to suit their own situations. We can never generalize common problems too and give a common answer of ‘try it, it worked for me’.

If it worked for someone else doesn’t mean it will give you the same results.. If we want to follow these great ideas in our lives we must read them many a times and gradually get the juice of it.. then only we will really benefited from them.

Sometimes or should I say always we are deprived of something which is so important in our life just to remind us that there are many other things too in life that need our immediate attention… like our real life….

Yes I am talking about my internet connection. Without which you can’t even imagine life anymore. And this long unexpected break made me realize how much important this blog-life of mine is to me and how much weightage it has in my life.

Much more than I thought..

All the time I kept thinking what is happening in the blog world, Indyeah must have written that anti-terrorist mission post, and what about hitchy and scratchy, what all fun everyone will be having at his adda, and whatever all the mommy blogger’s (Smitha, Solilo, Rashmi….) cute and smart kids came up with in my absence… and our Vimmuuu.. what more fame claim posts has he bombarded the blogospehere with.. and did OG find his Miss Z / Rajamma / or atleast some 3sha look-alike so that he could boast about his domestic skills to her…?

and much much more………

Actually there was some major net trouble in the office and I was offline for such a long time that I feel like its been years or so…

To add jale pe namak and teekhi mirchi my lappie also took sides with the bad guys and refused to let me meet my blog buddies. Some technical trouble in it too..

Ab isse bura to kuch nahi ho sakta…. Haina..?

Hope these problems get solved soon…

But the good part is I got to spend a lot of good time with real people.. I mean whom I meet face to face.. We went on a small road trip with hubby’s colleague’s family, they have a 1 year old daughter who is a cuite… for a small kid she was really well behaved. Even during the ride she was not very uneasy and was playing with us all the time.

The view I must say was picture perfect. The whole of the highway lined with the beach on one side and mountains on the other. Couldn’t get any better..

Such a scenic view it was….. Beach blue as turquoise.. and the water was so cool and the whole beach was lined with pebbles all over.

A picnic on the beach with friends.. is my idea of a great weekend.

If we had had the lappie we could have missed such a great opportunity.

So that is why they say every cloud has a silver lining..

For the health conscious person in me I have switched to the ‘Green tea’.

I love my coffee and everyone knows that and tea has always been a second preference.. not that I didn’t like tea. But it was always second to coffee.

But now I am loving tea more than my first love. (I mean coffee )

Recently I had shifted to black tea as I didn’t like the taste of milk in tea. And i found  Black tea to be really great.

When I was in India I loved the tea with milk that mom made. Also the ones we drank at the railway stations.. not the ones in the train as they were more water and no milk.. not much taste. But strong ginger tea definitely interested me.

But here I had started avoiding tea totally. Maybe it’s the milk I don’t like here. So I decided to try the black tea as I couldn’t drink coffee all the time. And I loved the black tea. It has the strong taste and feel. And so I became a regular of that.

But now I am a step ahead and getting addicted to the wonderful heavenly green tea.

Last week I accidentally stumbled upon a box of green tea in my office. (Read in my super boss’s drawer, he is out of town and me and my boss are using this opportunity to the fullest by the time Superboss returns there might not be any left for him.)

So.. It is not just the great benefits it will have on my health that has pulled me to it.  But I dig the aroma and the taste.  The colour pleasing to the eye and the strong smell of ginger and lemon in my cup.. is aaaaaaahhhhhh….!!!!!

Even breathing it in refreshes my mind and soul.

I was wondering if green tea was better than black tea  and should I buy a box for myself, so I went looking for details. Turns out both are great for health. Not that I didn’t know before but never looked into it deeply.

Now I will make a habit of drinking both alternately as I love both.

Right now I am having a wonderful cup of hot and piping green tea.. and just looking out of the window…thinking nothing….. Life is bliss.

Nope have to hurry back to work…

Typing the words was very difficult for her. It was her husband afterall…

Asking him to leave was really a difficult decision for her.

But she had to do it, for her company… for herself.

Had she not known how he was when she saw him the first time at the bank? Carelessly dropping a bundle of 100 Rs note and didn’t even noticing till she had pointed out. Thanking sheepishly, he didn’t even care to count before stuffing it into his expensive suit.

That should have been the first hint to her about his attitude with money. But maybe his good looks and amiable behaviour blinded her. And she was not able to look past those sugary words when destiny brought them together to work at the same place, and their casual friendship started to deepen.

She should have seen it coming when she started paying his overdrawn credit card bills saying afterall we dined together, and we shopped for me too, and I too am obliged to share it. While actually it was no sharing as she was doing all the paying and he got the credit of being a good boyfriend who took her shopping every now and then and took her to expensive restaurants, where you even need to pay to sniff the food.

Does love blind you like that? She couldn’t see her own bank balances draining.

And when he had asked her to marry him just when she planned to start something of her own, was it not a hint to his intentions. She was over the top as for her it was twice an occasion to celebrate.

And when he insisted to be the financial controller to her business, atleast that should have given her the needed jolt to wake up and see the reality. But she thought her husband loves her so much he wants to support and take right care of her funds.

How could she not see it coming?

All his decisions made the company not only ‘not grow’ but actually lose value. His extravagant expenditure and justifying it, drawing money from the company account saying it was all for the growth of the company, while all the time it was spent on his personal pleasures.

He was a good husband she thought. Always told her he loved her.

Why not? She was the greatest thing that had happened to him.

But it isn’t too late now.

She had fed him for more that 5 years now, and nothing should stop her from freeing herself.

He was taking her company down and she had to get rid of him to save what was left of it.

The letter that came today had been a wake up call. He had taken credit from all over the town in the name of the company and now she was looking at bankruptcy as there was no way out.

She wanted to take control before it was actually over.

So the termination letter ended with a request to leave the company.

And now was the turn to terminate the relationship too.

They tell a tale..

Look deep into them and you’d find a soul… waiting to be discovered.

They want to be seen..  felt.. remembered… and  thought about..

“What do you see in Me..?” it asked.

It was her routine scroll through all old photographs before bedtime..

“Why, I see me…” She said happily sighing how young she looked just a few years ago.

“That is the problem..!” it said sharply.

“What is..?” she asked.

 “You don’t see Yourself…” it said.

“No..?  What are you saying..?” asked her puzzled face.

“But it is me.. see.. standing right there in the middle..” She showed pointing a finger towards a young girl standing in the middle of a pool of people.

She started with the details on when it was taken…where… and who all are standing there… what faces they are making and what they are thinking while the photo was taken… she remembered each and every detail as if it was just yesterday..

“What do you think I see..?” she asked throwing back a lock if grey hair.

“You see who you could have been..!” came the indifferent answer.

“You still could have been that… and there…” it said softly.

“What do you mean..?” she asked.

 “Don’t you understand… all these years… This is who you have not been.. This is who you have been running from… you drifted from your family.. you wanted your independence.. your space…your career and now all you have are these empty voids in your life that you try to fill with Me.”

“Why do you think you keep looking at me..?”  it said looking her deep into the eye.

Her face hung. A drop came down on it.

 “Go fill your life with real people you love.. see if there are any left.. they all waited for you and then left disappointed….reach out.. hold on to them.. they are life…!”

 “Go love new ones.. that is all you need…. Not Me…!” Said the considerate Photograph.

Finally after 2 long years of waiting…. i am off to my home….

I am so thrilled to go home and meet Mom , Dad & Bro… 

25 days of purely home .. me alone.. 

yes.. leaving hubby here ..

sound familiar .. Read it a Hitchy’s blog..?

i too was surprised when i logged in to inform that i am leaving day after tomorrow and here i see post about just what i was going to write… 

well not everything.. 

Bro is leaving home for his higher studies.. Mom will have the regular ‘Empty nest syndrome’ … so me going to stay with her for the month to make her get used to live without my bro..

That would be difficult.. she’s not used to living without me now even till now.

i will keep blogging from home…  maybe not this regularly.. but will keep you all updated.

will have tonnes to talk and eat… ghar ka khana.. wow.. i can’t wait.

I’ll reach on 4th and bro is leavig on 5th. that is the only sad part. i just get to be with him one day and that too he has an exam that day… so its just half a day.

i tried to get my leave approved a bit earlier but.. my attempts went in vain.. my Superboss didn’t approve.

But good news is .. its Rakshabandhan that day.. THE day for bros & sis.. and will be with him that day. and will be able to see him off.. on his journey to a better life.

Then i also have all my Friends to meet..

Friendship day tomorrow.. me a bit late.. so what…???  we’ll celebrate Friendship week or month.. its just friends we need and that is occassion enough to celebrate…. no matter what day it is..

My best friend just got engaged last week .. will get to meet her.. loads of gossip… sharing her feelings… me giving advice on starting new married life (guys don’t laugh..) ok i won’t advice… just talk .. talk.. talk.. although she will be the one who’ll do the talking part as she loves to.. and me is always the listener…..

Maybe watch a few movies… shop a lot.. and i mean a LOT…  :-)

Enjoy rain..  eat garma garam Mom made pakodas.. 

Maybe hve some wise chats with Dad.. (maybe now he’ll consider me a grown up.. hmmm .. no way.. still daddy’s little girl… )

I will Relive the life i had before…

Can’t wait to get home.. still 2 whole days to go….

I am totally set to fly.. without wings..

P.S – i might not be able to blog this week… and i’ll reply to all the comments from home..

P.P.S - Happy Friendship Day to all of my blog samaj friends….

Pal has tagged me with the “ABC Tag” and here I go again with all I could tell about myself..

But first the rules…..

Link the person who tagged you.   Check.

Post the rules on your blog.   Check.

Share the ABCs of you.    Check.  Of course I have nothing else to post.

Tag 3 people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.   Check. Names coming after the tag finishes.

Let the 3 tagged people know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.   Check.

Do not tag the same person repeatedly but try to tag different people, so that there is a big network of bloggers doing this tag! (Very Important One!)   Check.. Yes I want to know about those who don’t talk much about themselves..

A – Available/Single?  - Don’t available and single mean the same..? *ahem* Not available. 

B – Best friend?  -  My mom.. can share anything with her..

C – Cake or Pie? - Hmm.. Yummy Cake.

D – Drink of choice?  - Coffee in the morning….

E – Essential item you use every day? – My toothbrush  :-D  for me pearly whites..

F – Favorite colour? - Beautiful Black.

G – Gummy Bears or Worms? - Not much of a candy person.. if that is what they mean.. if not then the gummy bears.. Though I do like worms too, gummy bears are cute..

H – Hometown – Anonymity alert..

I – Indulgence?  – Blogging

J – January or February? -  Hmm… February… less days to work..

K – Kids & their names?  -  Sorry they are not here yet..

L – Life is incomplete without?  -  Finding yourself….

M – Marriage date? -  Will let you know if you promise to send gifts..

N – Name? Your real name!!  - Yeah right… as if I am gonna tell.

O – Oranges or Apples? -  An apple a day.. I don’t like going to the doctor

P – Phobias/Fears?  -  Me fears..??? As the great Simba says.. Hah! I walk on the wild side.. I laugh in the face of danger.. Ha ha ha ha…

Q – Quote for today?  - Don’t fix it if it ain’t broken.

R – Reason to smile?  - Being in love with the same person for the past 2 years…

S – Season?  - Winters

T – Tag 3 People?  –  Neeraja, Shayari and Rohini

U – Unknown fact about me? -  I could write a book on this one.

V – Vegetable you don’t like?  - Pumpkin

W – Worst habit? – Think a lot

X – X-rays? -  Never had a chance

Y – Your favorite food?  - Indian food and also Pizzas

Z – Zodiac sign? -  Sagittarius

Now my turn to Tag three people and they are Neeraja, Shayari and Rohini i want to know more about them.